No Self or True Self?

This is Chapter 14 of the Kornfield book.

“…Jack Engler, the Buddhist teacher and psychologist at Harvard, put it this way: ‘You must be somebody before you can be nobody.’  By this he means that a strong and healthy sense of self is needed to withstand the meditative process of dissolution and come to a deep realization of emptiness.  This is true, but do not take it in a linear way–the development of self and the realization of the emptiness of self can actually happen in any order.  Like all aspects of spiritual life, self and emptiness evolve together as a spiral in our practice, with new and deeper ways of understanding, each succeeding one another.”  (Kornfield 205).

The Spiritual Roller Coaster: Kundalini and Other Side Effects

This is Chapter 9 of the Kornfield book.

The sections in this chapter are:

(1)  Atitudes Toward Altered States–Certain spiritual paths insist that we need to attain profoundly altered states of consciousness in order to discovery a “transcendent” vision of life, to open beyond our body and mind and realize the divine taste of liberation. [Other schools]’s teachings say that liberation and transcendence must be discovered here and now, for if not here in the present, where else can it be found?  Instead of seeking to transcend, the perspective of the “immanent” school teaches reality, enlightenment, or the divine must shine through every moment or it is not genuine. (p. 120)

(2)  Some Common Altered States–When we begin a spiritual practice, we struggle with the pains of our body and the armoring we have forged for it over the years, we face emotional storms, and we encounter a procession of five common hinderances.  But as we continue spiritual practice, and become more familiar and compassionate with our deepest difficulties, even the most ingrained pattens of holding and fear will gradually lose their power over us.  We develop a spirit of calm and steadiness, whatever our means of practice. (p. 122)

(a)  Raptures–rapture is a broad term used to cover the many kinds of chills, movements, lights, floating, vibrations, delight, and more that open with deep concentration, as well as the enormous pleasure they can bring to meditation.  (p. 122)…Deep concentration can lead to all kinds of visions and visionary experiences.  Floods of memories, images of past lives, scenes of foreign lands, pictures of heavens and hells, the energies of all the great archetypes, can open before our eyes.  (p. 125)…(this has happened to me:  “…we can experience a release of the strongest kinds of emotions, from sorrow and despair to delight and ecstasy.  Meditation may feel like an emotional roller coaster as we allow ourselves to be plunged into unconscious emotions.” p. 126)

(b)  Chakras–This section describes the chakras and the openings of the energy body and the experience as our inner energy tries to move and free itself in the body

(3)  Skillful Means of Working with the Energetic and Emotional Openings–we need a teacher who has personally encountered and understood these dimensions of the psyche

(a)  All Experiences are Side Effects–In the Buddhist tradition, the Buddha often reminded students that the purpose of his teaching was not the accumulation of special good deeds and good karma or rapture or insight or bliss, but only the sure heart’s release–a true liberation of our being in every realm.  This freedom and awakening, and this alone, is the purpose of any genuine spiritual path. (p. 129)

(b)  Finding the Brake—very cool and interesting section!  The most important thing, however, is:  it is necessary to find a guide, someone who has touched their own madness, grief, and loss of boundaries, who can gradually and fearlessly direct us back to the ground of our own true nature.  (p. 132)

(c)  Awareness of the Dance–the practitioner’s primary responsibility is to open to the experience with a full awareness, observing and sensing it as a part of the dance of our human life. (p. 133)

(4)  Meditation:  Reflecting on Your Attitude Toward Altered States

Necessary Healing

This is Chapter 4 of the Kornfield book.  I’m so happy today! I got the A Path with Heart on CD today!  So I’ll now have the opportunity to listen to the readings then browse the chapters for what I want to share here.  

This chapter is on “healing.”  I really think that Kornfield’s notion of healing can be likened to the Christian notion of  forgiveness.  It’s incredible because the Bible post on Wednesday is on forgiveness, and tomorrow’s Saturday post is also on forgiveness.  

On p. 41, Kornfield explains:  “Wise spiritual practice requires that we actively address the pain and conflict of our life in order to come to inner integration and harmony.  Through the guidance of a skillful teacher, meditation can help bring this healing.  Without including the essential step of healing, students will find that they are blocked from deeper levels of meditation or are unable to integrate them into their lives.”

The chapter goes through physical feelings, tightness, contraction, blending it with aversion, action, “I hope this goes away soon,” “Life is always painful,”  to heal we must become aware of all these layers.  This next quote speaks to me because it references diet, which impacts my life in a huge way.

“Brining systematic attention to our body can change our whole relationship to our physical life. We can notice more clearly the rhythms and needs of our bodies. Without mindfully attending to our bodies, we may become so busy in our daily lives that we lose touch with a sense of appropriate diet, movement, and physical enjoyment. Meditation can help us find out in what ways we are neglecting the physical aspects of our lives and what our body asks of us.” (Kornfield 45)

I found a forgiveness quote!

“In truly listening to our most painful songs, we can learn the divine art of forgiveness. While there is a whole systematic practice of forgiveness that can be cultivated, both forgiveness and compassion arise spontaneously with the opening of the heart. Somehow, in feeling our own pain and sorrow, our own ocean of tears, we come to know that ours is a shared pain and that the mystery and beauty and pain of life cannot be separated. This universal pain, too, is part of our connection with one another, and in the face of it we cannot withhold our love any longer.” (Kornfield 47)

Thy Will Be Done

Thy Will Be Done

On August 10, 2013, I attended the Charis Retreat for young adults. I practice religion as a Roman Catholic, and I was happy to be able to attend a retreat intended specifically for young adults. The theme of the retreat was “Transitions.” One of the speakers discussed a tough relationship she endured which eventually fizzled out. Her key point was “Not my will, but God’s will be done.” She described that she put too much of her own effort into the relationship and did not listen to God as the object of her affection began spiraling away from her. When she finally began to allow God to perform his will over her, when she yielded her will to God’s will, good results followed.

Since that talk I’ve had an attitude of “Not my will, but God’s will be done.” This is so basic to the Catholic church that it is even said every Mass in the Our Father: “Thy Kingdom Come, Thy Will be Done, on Earth as it is in Heaven.” How could I have completely missed the message? Or was I ignoring the message?

Now that my mind is focused on achieving God’s Will, it has noticed some things in readings that I would like to share now.

The following are passages from Jivamutki Yoga:

• “Tasmai Shri Gurvuey Namaha: This means ‘I offer all my efforts to the teacher.’ Without the effort of the student, no teaching can be obtained. I bow; I surrender all of my self to that Self. Not my will, but Thy will, be done.” (Gannon 18)
• “The Sanskirt word mantra is composed of two sounds, man and tra. Man means the mind or the thinking instrument, and tra means to bridge or to cross over. Tra is the root of the English word travel or traverse. A mantra allows you to travel beyond thought… When you chant Thy Will Be Done, you are traveling beyond thought.” (Gannon 212)
• Choose a mantra, such as “not my will, but Thy will, be done,” inhaling Not my will, exhaling but Thy Will, be done. “Silently chant the mantra, coordinating the repetition of the sound with the incoming and outgoing breath. The mantra doesn’t necessarily have to be divided between the inhale and exhale. You could also repeat the entire mantra on the inhale and then again on the exhale. Whatever thoughts or distractions arise in the mind, let them come and let them go, give them no attention. Instead, give all your attention to the internal chanting of the mantra.” (Gannon 225)

Thomas Merton Prayer from Thoughts in Solitude:

• My Lord God, I have no Idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, thought I may know nothing about it. Therefore I will trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are eve with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

Online Article and My Thoughts:

The theme of the retreat was Transitions, and they included an article in the packet each attendee of the retreat received. That article focuses on transitions and the fear we face when we are in transition. I’d like to add that during transitions we are tempted to control the situation. Controlling the situation is clearly refusing to allow God’s Will to be part of the transition. I therefore believe that it is important to let God take over, even thought it is super-scary, during times of transition. This article explains the place for God in transitions well:

http://bustedhalo.com/features/when-the-spirit-moves-finding-god-in-transition

The following snippets are from The Spirit and Practice of Moving into Stillness by Erich Schiffmann, p. 21-23

“…growth hurts when you resist change, and most of us have an inclination to resist change in an attempt to remain comfortable by staying the same. but life is change…in order to stay comfortable as you grow, you must flow with the changes and not attempt to remain the same...nor can you be comfortable in old belief structures and limited self-concepts...fearless and defenseless...that which is good for us is not always recognized as such right toff the bat...it hurts more not to change...embrace change...movement of fulfillment...less traumatic and more joyful...go with the flow and grow...peace of mind…grateful to the creative God Force for the privilege of citizenship and the joy of participation in the endless creativity of the event called life”

And a parting quote from C.S. Lewis: